We recently told you about Dewitos, the nightmarish concoction the combines Mountain Dew and Doritos into a beverage that is more of a dare than a drink. Last night, the hard-hitting Colbert Report took on this story and not even stone-faced host Stephen Colbert could keep from laughing.
“I sit here as eyewitness to history, privileged to say the following words,” began Colbert, “Mountain Dew now tastes like Doritos.”
After telling the stoners of the world that they were indeed correct that “Frito-Lay can hear your thoughts,” Colbert explained how this meeting of the snacks represented a scientific breakthrough.
“With Dewitos now a reality, mankind is approaching the long-predicted ’snack singularity’ — the ‘snackularity’ if you will — in which food scientists achieve a unity of all flavors; drinks that taste like chips, chips that taste like dips,” he said. “We are all flavornauts, exploring the outer reaches of the Milky Way, which is now available as a nasal spray.”
This far into the segment, Colbert has managed to mostly remain in character, but that facade shattered like so many brittle corn chips when reading this too-true statement:
“Until now, to get this flavor combo you’d have to consume Mountain Dew and Doritos separately… then throw up in your mouth a little bit.”
Recovering from his case of the giggle, Colbert then suggests a great slogan for the drink:
by Chris Morran via Consumerist
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